I Ain't Lost

Once there was a business man who was accustomed to giving orders and having his own ways. On the way to an important meeting, he decided to take a short cut, but he soon found himself completely lost in a strange neighborhood. He asked the first person he saw, a young boy, for direction.
“Hey boy, how to get to Dover from here?” “I don’t know,” the boy answered with a little embarrassment. The man continued, “Then how far is it from here to Clayton?” “I don’t know that either,” the boy answered. The man was a little frustrated, “Is there anyone around here who can give me directions, then?” One more time, the boy answered, “I don’t know.” The man’s questions became angrier because the boy kept responding with the same answer. Finally, the man raised his voice, “Well, you don’t know much, do you!”
And the boy smiled for the first time. He looked up to the winding street on which his house was located. Under the evening light that was shining through the window, he saw his brothers and sisters playing under the watch of his dad. He looked at the man and answered, “No, I don’t know much. But I ain’t lost.”
Can you imagine: the man must have felt embarrassed because he knew the boy was right, and he couldn’t argue against him. The man is accustomed to relying on his own knowledge and his own ways to get where he wants to go; but such knowledge and such ways can’t get him where he needs to arrive on that day. Haven’t we all experienced it in one way or another in our lives? We thought that with the education or the family background or the economic status we had, we could get to where we want in life?
Back to the Gospel today: every time we listen to the story of Thomas being reprimanded by Jesus, it is easy for us to criticize Thomas for his lack of belief. But think more carefully about the setting of the story, you might discover that we would have done the same as Thomas did. He has never seen anyone during and before his life time rising from death. Common experience taught him that for a thing to be real, it has to be experienced it in a tangible way: it has to be visible or touchable … When Jesus was still alive, of course Thomas heard Him talk about the resurrection, but how did he know if the Teacher was talking about a real resurrection of the body or he was talking about something else. So of course, when the women and other disciples told him about this rather crazy news that his Master, the one who was killed a couple days before, has risen from death, he reacted the way he did.
Just like us, Thomas only relied on what he had experienced in his life so far. He had only one approach to truth: he needs the tangible to confirm whether a thing or an event is real or not. Don’t we still hear this kind of reasoning today: unless I see God, I wouldn’t believe he exists; if God does not let me win this lottery, he is not a loving God; Jesus didn’t exist because no one has ever seen him, we only hear stories about Him written by his followers …
But the Good News we hear today is not about the lack of faith in a disciple, but rather the story of how the risen Christ helps his disciple to step a step further, so that their knowledge about God would not only rely on what they are able to see and touch. What he teaches Thomas and us is that we may need more than our normal way of knowing to get to the truth about God.
“Blessed are those who have not seen, yet believe.” But how can we believe when we have not seen? I think what Jesus tries to convey here is that: for us to believe in a God who is beyond all power and intelligence and love, knowing is not the starting point. Like that business man in the story: knowing (or there lack of) is not the deciding factor. The child is not lost because he finds himself within a trusting relationship: he sees his brothers and sisters playing in his father’s house, he sees his loving father is watching over him and his brothers and sisters, and that is enough for him to know that he is not lost. The starting point for the boy’s knowing is relationship; the starting point for the man’s knowing is his own knowledge and his own ways of thinking and doing things.
I believe that Jesus wants to challenge us to approach the truth in a different way. Rather than starting from our own ways, our own thinking and our own strength, why don’t we start from agreeing to enter into a relationship with him. A person in a relationship knows the things that outsiders wouldn’t know. Before you become a parent, you could try your best to know what it is like to love a baby by reading books, watching shows or attending workshops; but you would not really know what it is like until you make the commitment to enter into a parent-child relationship. Holding your little one in your arms, you now know what it is like to love another human being who only eats, sleeps and poops. Not only that, you now understand what it was like for your parents when they took care of you as a baby, and you would love and appreciate them more. Do you see how a relationship prompts you to know more than books and lectures can provide you with?
“Blessed are those who have not seen, yet believe.” If I may put it in light of what we just talked about, this is how I would put it: blessed are those who may not know much about God, yet decide to enter into a relationship with Him. That relationship will let us know that, we may not know much, but we ain’t lost.

Teaching others by setting examples

A bystander happened to witness Bishop Michael Hoang Duc Oanh, Bishop of the Diocese of Kontum, picking up trash at the place where he just celebrated the Mass of the Immaculate Conception in his diocese.

He is indeed setting good example for us all.

(by the way, Kontum is where both my parents were born and grew up, and I was also born in this diocese)

Special Entry: a week with the poor, a week of grace

You are probably like me, wondering what Jesus really means when he says, “Blessed are those who are poor in spirit because the kingdom of heaven is theirs.” Probably I’ll spend the rest of my life wondering about the truth behind this teaching. However, I have the blessing to witness the beauty of this truth the past week when participating in a mission trip with a group of family missionaries in General Cepeda, which is not too far from Monterey, Mexico.

Coming from Vietnam, poverty is no stranger to me, but living in a materialist country like the US for a long time makes me almost forget that poverty exists and poverty is real. Some of us may never understand what it is like to be poor. In one of our visits to the ranchos, we met a lady sitting next to what used to be her house, or rather, her hut. It is now only a pile of dirt because the rain the past week has destroyed her house. She was sitting there with her little belongings, which were only some clothes, some kitchen tools and a mattress. She let us know she slept in the only room that was still standing after the rain. One of the evenings after we got back from the ranchos, I shared the meal table with a family of four: a husband, a wife, a little kid and a baby in her mother’s arm. They were among the regular visitors of our mission house every day. There were there because they had not had anything to eat for 4 days. While eating, some missionaries had to answer the door because another family needed some cash to bring their child to a surgery in a city that was one hour away. The mission house did not have enough money so all of us visiting missionaries chipped in our little contributions. The cost was only 40 US dollars. A priest just came back from a home visit and he seemed really sad and concerned. We found out later that he was sad because of the utmost poor living condition of the family he had just visited. The wife in the family was pregnant. They lived in house built of mud, so sanitary was a luxury. No one had any means of transportation to bring her to nearest clinic which was, I guessed, an hour away driving. She only relied on the visit of a doctor that stopped by each rancho every other month. When the priest was there, he had to join with other family members trying to kill a poisonous bug that was running around the bed of the pregnant woman. He said that in the US he would have called the police immediately if he had seen any animal living in such condition. Here lived a human person who was carrying the life of another human person in such a horrendous living condition.



Because of such extreme poverty, the permanent lay missionaries at the house adopt a poor life to be in solidarity with the people they are serving, and in order to have more to share. Compare to the local people’s poverty, the little discomfort of my life the past week becomes luxurious living. I had 3 meals a day. I slept on the top bunk in a small cabin with 15 other guys. If there was a breeze at night then we could fall asleep easier. If not, we just had to lie on our beds until the temperature cooled down a little. I got to only shower every other day because we were in the dessert, so everyone had to conserve water the best way we could. The temperature during the day was in the high 80’s if not low 90’s. It was cooler at night, especially toward the morning. Telephone is extremely expensive that we just did not use them. We squeezed more people than the capacity into a van to travel on bumpy mountain roads to visits different ranchos and houses everyday.



But the joy and peace in the house is abundant. Faith is an obvious existence, and the Holy Spirit is clearly visible in our daily life. At rest time every afternoon, we just hung around, sharing stories or singing or playing table games. Our day usually starts with a family-style prayer which includes praises and thanksgivings, then sharings of what has moved each person from the experience of the previous day, or what the Holy Spirit has inspired us through our prayers and meditations. We usually close the session with petitions. The faith sharings usually inspire me very much. Like my spiritual director usually says, “you know God’s grace is strongly at work in your life when you feel like the words from the Scripture just jump off the pages.” I have had so many “a-hah” moment during this week when I recognize many teachings of the Bible, or what I have learned before came to make sense.



That woman who lost her house because of the rain, she was as peaceful and joyful as a child receiving gift on Christmas Day. She was ready and quick to share with us visitors on that day the little treats that she still had in her ruined house. When we asked if she wanted anything from us, she only asked for a rosary so that she could continue praying and praising. Do you remember how Jesus praised a widow who put in the collection box in a temple only 2 pennies? In a chapel that we visited, the local villagers put together an image of Jesus that is so simple and, bluntly, ugly. But they come and pray with all their hearts in front of the image. They touch the image for blessing as a custom of the faithful here. In the US, it is common that people spend tons of money on pain-killers in order to get some peace and little joy in whatever sufferings they have in their lives. Here, their touch to the image takes place of those pain killers. They live with the joy and peace that just put you in awe when you witness it together with their sufferings. Do you remember the woman that is cured of her sickness just by touching Jesus’ cloak, and Jesus confirmed, “you faith has saved you”? You could see that the villagers are inspired when listening to the testimonies of the lay missioners or of other fellow villagers about their experience of God’s love in their lives. Then I am inspired by the whole experience. I am pretty sure this is the similar inspiration that the two disciples on the road to Emmaus had when Jesus appeared and explained to them about the history of God’s love to his people Israel. The lay missioners were not poor people, but they commit to live a poor life. Their choice of poverty is the decision to live in solidarity with the poor, the practicality of living simply so that others can simply live. They strive to live that beatitude that Jesus taught on the Mount, “Blessed are those who are poor in spirit…”



Please don’t take my sharing here as an effort to ease the reality of poverty in the world. Poverty is poverty, and it is an evil because it brings sufferings to people. God would never want his children to live in poverty. We will never understand the reason why there is poverty in the world. I came from poor country, so this week experience is not my first ever experience of extreme poverty. I am only writing this experience down to share with you that:
- poverty exists and it is real and it is painful
- we can do a lot from wherever we are to help the poor:
•the money for a cup of Starbuck coffee can send a pregnant woman to a hospital for a check up
•a prayer every day will strengthen those on the front line helping the poor
•a week spent with the missionaries will put you in close contact with the Holy Spirit
•and many more different ways …
- God has a special place in his heart and his eternal plan for the poor
- Those who commit to help poor brothers and sisters live a blessed life
- Materials are important for the quality of life, but they are not the deciding factor. We actually need very little to live a peaceful and joyful and happy life.

Here are some pics of the trip

Feast of St. Francis de Sales, Jan 24

An article titled 4 Ways to become Holy by Roger O'Brien in the March 1996 issue of U.S. Catholic was a source for this article. Used with permission -- Ed.

St. John Bosco grew up and was formed in the Piedmont region of Italy, whose capital is Turin,which was permeated with the influence and spirituality of St. Francis De Sales.

Spirituality is an aspect and part of every human being. Some have a heightened spirituality, others hardly any, and the majority of us fall somewhere in-between. Simply put, spirituality is the way we contact the Divine and recognize the Divine in the unfolding of our lives. We then respond to the Divine is a variety of ways. There are many "ways" we can do this and we follow in the Catholic-Christian tradition.

Here is a listing of only four of the main ones followed by a fifth-the "Salesian Spirituality." Can you recognize yourself in any of these?

First is the "Path of Intellect" or Thomistic Prayer. About 12% of Catholics follow this method. It uses the syllogistic method of St. Thomas Aquinas known as Scholastic prayer. The main emphasis is on the orderly progression of thought from cause to effect.

People of this prayer type prefer neat, orderly forms of the spiritual life, as opposed to the free-spirit, impulsive attitude of the Franciscan approach. Their spirituality is centered on the earnest pursuit of all the transcendental values: goodness, beauty, unity, love, life and spirit. St. Teresa of Avila is an example of this spirituality.

Those who follow this style of prayer seek total truth and authenticity in their lives and work hard to reach the whole truth about themselves, about God, and about sanctity. In this type of prayer, one takes a virtue or fault or theological truth and studies it from every possible angle.

Change of behavior is an essential part of this prayer--it doesn't stay at the intellectual level. There is generally a bias against this type of prayer today because it was so much in vogue before Vatican II.

The second "way" is the "Path of Devotion" or Augustinian prayer. The majority of saints are of this spiritual temperament, as are 12% of the population [but 50% of those who go on retreats or belong to small faith groups].

We must have the attitude of Jesus Christ. Man, did he have an attitude!

This method uses creative imagination to transpose the world of scripture to our situation today--as if the scripture passage is a personal letter from God addressed to each one of us. The essential element of this spirituality, going back to New testament times, is experiencing a personal relationship with God. Because they read between the lines and catch what is inexpressible and spiritual, those who follow the path of devotion best understand symbols and their use in the liturgy.

This path concentrates on meditations that loosen the feelings and expand the ability to relate to and love others. The stress is on the love of self, others, and God.

Those on this path can follow the four steps of the Lectio divina: listen to what God says in scripture; reflect prayerfully and apply it to today; respond to God's word with personal feelings; remain quiet and stay open to new insights.

The third "way" is the "Path of Service" or Franciscan Prayer. About 38% of the population are this spiritual type-but far fewer of this type come to church regularly.

Like St. Francis of Assisi, those who follow the path must be free, unconfined, and able to do whatever their inner spirit moves them to do. They don't like to be tied down by rules. St. Peter jumping into the water to go to Jesus exemplifies this type.

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Franciscan spirituality leads to acts of loving service, which can be a most effective form of prayer. Franciscan prayer is flexible and free-flowing, making full use of the five senses, and it is spirit-filled prayer. Those on this path can make a meditation on the beauty of a waterfall, flower, meadow, mountain, or ocean-all of God's creation.

There is more stress in prayer on the events of Jesus' life than on his teaching.

The fourth "way" is the "Path of Asceticism" or Ignatian Prayer. More than half of churchgoers practice this type of prayer of St. Ignatius of Loyola. It involves imagining oneself as part of a scene in order to draw some practical fruit from it for today.

This spirituality goes back to the Israelite way of praying in 1000 BC, to remember and immerse oneself in an event, thus reliving and participating in the event in a symbolic way.

St. Ignatius' preoccupation with order was aimed at overcoming "disorderly affections, so that the retreatant may make a decision that is in keeping with God's will."

The foregoing summaries in no way exhaust nor completely explain the "ways." Still, one gets the idea and whatever appeals is the way to go. In fact, most readers can identify with one or the other or know others who follow the different ways.

All the above focus in on prayer. They also inspire various approaches to Christian action. The "Salesian" way uses any method of prayer but does not belabor it. It can take distractions and use them to re-focus the heart on God. It also goes beyond prayer itself as an activity or exercise. Rather, it becomes more of an "attitude" in relation to God, self and the world.

Nowadays we have all heard expressions like: "What an attitude!"; "He/she's got an attitude;" "cop an attitude;" and so on. Sometimes it is helpful to adapt street parlance to the spiritual life as well. The above examples usually have a negative connotation, but we can also have a "good attitude."

We must have the "attitude" of Jesus Christ. Man, did he have an attitude! Salesian spirituality teaches that the imitation of Christ, central to the entire history of Christian spirituality, does not require withdrawal or flight from the world or human society. The leitmotif found throughout the writings of St. Francis de Sales and St. Jane Frances de Chantal, co-founders of the women's order, the Visitation of Holy Mary, is "Live Jesus!"

"Live Jesus" is not the same as "Long Live Jesus," or "Hooray for Jesus," or "Three Cheers for Jesus!" It is the verbal imperative-"[You] Live Jesus!" in the sense of "Be Jesus" or "let Jesus be you." It is the imitation of Christ with an attitude-the attitude that everything one does, everything one thinks and believes, everything one says is Christ alive. We have an agenda of incarnating once again Jesus in our families, our workplaces, our school, our playgrounds, driving the freeway, playing golf, watching TV or going to church.

Our world is searching for love and affection, sometimes in the weirdest places. We are looking for heart. Salesian spirituality is permeated with references to the human heart or the heart of God or of Jesus. Francis says that to "live Jesus" is to have Jesus' name engraved on our heart, viz., in the very core of our being. Affective and endearing language is also characteristic. Francis emphasized LOVE, JOY, PEACE, PATIENCE as fruits of the Holy Spirit [Gal. 5:22-23]. From a masculine or feminine viewpoint we are all looking for that which touches our inner self in an affectionate, endearing, accepting, unconditional way. Salesian spirituality offers us that.

The cold shower of reality is that human nature is wounded by sin and much discipline and serious formation are required to recover the ability to love purely. To love purely means to model our love on the unconditional love of God for humankind. We have all too often experienced or witnessed the opposite. Love that is selfish, self-serving and self-destructive is really the antithesis of "pure love."

Another characteristic of Salesian spirituality is that our hearts, in the holistic biblical sense, are to be surrendered to the living presence of Christ. Humility is synonymous with truth. We have to recognize God as Creator and ourselves as 'not the creator' but a creature made in God's image and likeness, and endowed with an innate divine dignity and with the capacity for union with God. Thus Salesian spirituality is very much charismatic, finding its source and guidance in the Holy Spirit.

Thus every human being is invited by God to divine union. This invitation is for everyone--layperson or cleric, man or woman, celibate or married, young or old. St. Mary Mazzarello, with St. John Bosco, co-Foundress of the Daughters of Mary Help of Christians, the Salesian Sisters, was an example of living, breathing, praying and writing "Live Jesus!"

Don Bosco spoke about joy, doing one's duties well. To Saint Dominic Savio, one of his students [1857], he directed him to turn his fellow students around-peer ministry. Savio is quoted as saying to a newly arrived boarder, "Here we make holiness consist in being always cheerful."

There is more, but let this suffice for now. The Salesian spirituality lived in authentic fashion becomes a great attraction for others. St. John Bosco so embodied this spiritual way that he was an almost irresistible draw for youngsters of all ages and all walks of life. This spirituality is easy for young people [and old people!] because it does not require long prayers or devotional practices. For youth it is enough to eat well, sleep well, play well, study well, pray well and well, well, well-one gets the idea.

The bottom line is that this spirituality in the Salesian tradition is for all without reservation. Sanctity is for all. One can be holy by living one's life to the fullest in the love of Jesus and doing one's job to the best of one's ability for the love of others. Only one thing remains to be said: "Live Jesus!"

Source: Website of the Salesian Western Province

Who Wins?

Timmy was back home for the Christmas break. That first night, he pulled out the chess board and challenged his dad as he had used to when he was a little kid. Timmy is really good at chess, and he knows it. As far as he remembered, his dad had only won once or twice in the past. "Come on, dad. Let's see if you can beat me after all these years, hehe."

Dad looked at him, smiled and asked, "Any achievement lately?" Not even looking up, Timmy answered, "Well, no one in my hall can beat me yet since I moved in."

Two hours later, Timmy was not the same confident man. They had played four matches, and Timmy had not won even once. He looked at his dad, surprised and confused. He finally asked, "Have you played a lot lately? You just become ... so good at this"

Dad looked at him calmly, "I haven't played since the last time we played." Timmy became more confused, "But you sucked back then. I always won."

Dad just looked at Timmy silently. All of a sudden, Timmy understood everything. He remembered the night he came back from the first chess club meeting. He lost his confidence because the kids in the club were just too good. It was his dad who encouraged him to stay on, and offered to play with him every night for him to practice. “Foolish me, all this time I thought I was better than my dad.” He thought to himself, then finally asked his dad, “Why do you decide to show your true skill today?”

Putting the chess board away, dad answered, "Does it matter that you knew my skills back then or you know my skills now?" Timmy snapped, "Of course, dad. I thought I was good"

Dad slowly said, "Timmy, you are good because I am good. I was good back then as I am good now. But what matters more is I have always loved you. I loved you when you felt good about yourself, and I still love you the same when you feel like a loser"

Timmy answered impatiently, "Whatever, dad. What are you talking about?"

Dad continued, "Don't you feel like a loser now?" Timmy didn't answer though he knew that's how he was feeling. Dad said in a soft voice, "Aren't you also convinced now that I love you so much to let you win all these years?

Timmy and dad looked at each other. They had never been closer to each other.

Mercy

I come

Before you, helpless

No prayer can be said

No promise to be made

Have mercy on me

Lord, my God.

I come

So do the ones in my heart

They have their crosses

Just like I do mine

Before you, we are helpless

Little thing could be done

Solutions? I find none.

Have mercy on us

Lord, our God.

And I trust.

And we trust.

My scattered thoughts on the last days at St. John's

I've been here for 2 months and I have served 2 burial Masses, one Anglo, one Hispanic. Father asked me to move out quick or there would be another one, who knows it may be for a Vietnamese this time. On my last days here, however, I have to bury 5 baby fish. Poor little things. Probably I'm gonna name them after the guys who helped me clean the pool at the beginning of summer: Tony, Kenny, Michael, Thinh ... who else was there on that day, oh yeah, Ed (my pastor, Fr. Edward). There you go, RIP - Tony, Kenny, Micheal, Thinh and Ed.


I got to drive a school bus this summer, how cool is that. It's a small one though, but I got to turn open the Stop sign, and open the door to look when passing the railroad track. I don't know, I've always wanted to to that.

At White Water Park, in the afternoon, I actually told the kids, "You guys go on and play, I'm taking a nap." I actually took a nap next to some lady chaperons. *sigh* old age!



I've never eaten out this much. There is no cook in the Rectory, so I have to go out technically every meal, unless someone invites me to their homes. I understand now why priests usually have big belly. I think I'm good in that sense, because mine is ... noticeable :(

I've learned from doing fundraising in this parish that each ethnic community has a different approach to doing it: Bake Sale and cash donation work well w/ the Anglo and African-
American community, while raffle off religious articles and selling fruits work like magic for the Hispanic community. And for the Vietnamese ... I don't know. I only saw them at Mass, but they all disappeared before I finished blowing out the candles at the altar.

Speaking of which, I've wondered why the Vietnamese who go to this Church rarely talked to me over the time I was here while the other communities talked and joked around and hugged and kissed me like crazy. Probably because of the false announcement at the beginning of Summer: "Tri Nguyen, Seminarian of the Archdiocese of Atlanta, fluent in English, French and Spanish."

Though I'm on full-time assignment this summer, I think I've spent more time w/ my friends and the people from TNTT group at my parish, even more than before I joined the seminary.

I have once more proved to myself that online class doesn't work for me. I think I read more newspapers, watched more movies and youtube, and spent more time on facebook this summer. Every time I had to sit down to do online study for my Philosophy class, I found myself in those places after a short while. What else did I pick up this summer? Gardening and taking care of the fish. You know why, because the garden and the fish pond are far from my desk where I keep the Philosophy book.

I hope my mind is not this saturated by the time we get back to school at the end of August.

Life Journey within one week

Not having recovered from the DHNS youth convention in Tampa, I found myself on the highway to Charlotte, NC with a friend to visit the dying mother of a Salesian priest friend of mine.

Staying over night at her son’s house, we stayed up late talking with the family. We talked about the feisty mother who has been so strong to hold on to life with her very frail health; we talked about the loving father who has been so hurt seeing his loved one dying; we talked about the hardship that every single member of the family endures taking care of their wife/mother/mother-in-law/grandmother. Those are what we talked about; but what I saw was the tremendous love everyone was pouring out for one another. The daughter-in-law amazed me with her gentleness and utmost care when I caught her several time wiping the mother’s face and combing her hair. The loving husband made my heart sink when I caught him sitting quietly next to her for hours. He just looked at her and she looked at him. Not one word. Only enduring love. They have been together and the have been through so many ups and downs of their lives. The oldest daughter was patiently taking to her mom though she knew it was only a one-way communication: whatever the mom said, everyone understood, but she did not comprehend whatever was going on and being said. The grown son made a comment while spoonfeeding his mother, “Human life moves through cycle: you start out as a baby and you come back to the baby stage at the end of your life. My mom is acting like a baby now.” He stopped to hold the juice bottle for her to drink. “The problem is,” he continued, “with babies everyone wants to take care of, but with old people, they are easy to be forgotten and abandoned.” We all nodded, not knowing what to think of it. I didn’t know what he meant; I only saw the love and care that he was pouring out for his mom in these last days. He’s a business man, father of two, carrying some sickness himself. Over the 20 hours I stayed at their house, if he was not busy feeding her, he was fixing her bed, bathing her, cleaning the house in between business phone calls that he still had to make. The two school-age boys hugged their grandmother when they got home from school then went off to do homework, then play. I guess they couldn’t understand much what it really means to have a family member’s life slowly passed away in front of them. But that doesn’t matter much because what they are also witnessing is greater than any force in life. They are witnessing the love everyone is giving each other. This love their whole family is giving to their grandmother is not based on the beautiful appearances, because their dying grandmother is obviously not beautiful; not on physical strength because she is at her most frail stage of health; not on excitement, because there are only slow and silent moments in the house; not on productivity because their grandmother is doing nothing but being fed, and their whole family spends all their time taking care of her.

Yes, they are experiencing the counter-cultured love. They are experiencing the true Christian love through family love. The seed of love is being implanted in them when the see what their parents, their aunt and their grandfather are doing.

Young people renew my enthusiasm for life. Old people remind me of the beauty of life. But people treating each other with Christian assures me of the love of God.

Daydream in class these days

Living a life on my own strength
Thought I could do well, and could go at length
But without you in just a heart beat
I came to term with who I truly need

It's not about me
But grace given for free
It's not about strength
But your mercy that never ends
It's not about success
But faith lived out at my best
It's not about righteousness
For who to you is just

It's not about me, it's not
But all about you, my God.

in preparing for DHNS - notes

Be Deeply Rooted so to be Far Reaching


I'm actually so happy when reading Long's email about some suggested themes for the next DHNS MDN. It is clear there are two themes they want to incorporate, and the reason I'm so happy is because these are the two very essential aspects of the identity of a member of TNTT, or even for any Catholic at all.

1 - Coming back to our root which is the Eucharist
2 - Reaching out to others through service, thus the awareness of the mission work led by cha Thong and cha Chuong

These are the two movements that a person goes through over his/her growing up. There are points in their life, the only way for them to reach the, so called, "spiritual being," or God, is through service: doing good deeds for others. There are also other points when they feel that the only way to reach God is through deep praying and worshiping. There is nothing wrong with either approach, but too much of one while lacking the other only reflects a spiritual life that is not yet wholesome: that person will continue sensing something missing in their life.

Is there a starting point: prayer first or service first? There may be several different points of view on this question, but in my experience, it really depends on the developmental stage of a person or an age group in a social context. For younger people, they may be at the stage when it is harder to grasp the spiritual as something one can communicate through prayer. They need something concrete. They also need to be able to "feel" what they are doing, and feel that what they are doing is really going somewhere. For groups of people who are more experienced in life, especially spiritual life, who are more capable of abstract thinking, and who are more able to reach the conviction that God does exist in the things that human can't touch or feel, they may be more likely to find God's presence through their praying and worshiping.

The important thing to remember is, however, that it doesn't matter where we start, we have to keep moving. The moment we think we have reached your destination in spiritual life, our spiritual life is dead. It has to keep leading us to the deeper and deeper levels. Meeting God through prayer and worship will purify our intention and and strengthen our charity, so we can serve people with a more unconditional love. Serving people with an unconditional love will lead us to a deeper conviction that we and our human family will forever need God who comes to satisfy our hearts' desire through prayer. The cycle keeps on to lead us to the deeper and deeper levels of reality.



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But for a Catholic, is that all: prayer and service? what makes us Catholic unique?

So we understand the role of prayer and worship and service in our spiritual life. What makes us Catholic unique from the rest is: more than prayer which is a human action, we have liturgy which is a divine action through human act.

--> Need to develop more on this thoughts

--> Maybe I can work on sketching or suggesting some applications for a Eucharistic way of life (spirituality)

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The four aspects of youth development = a suggested model for a youth convention


1. Human aspect: all the fun activities such as sports, competitions, games, community buildings, dramas, sight-seeing, youth rally (with the band)

2. The encounter with Jesus:
(a) the personal encounter: private prayer, adoration, praise & worship, faith-sharing sessions, quiet time for meditation, perpetual adoration (expose the Sacrament overnight with someone adoring all the time)
(b) the encounter within the Church: sacraments, liturgy

3. Membership in the Church community --> at this convention, it could be teaching NSs (and HTs) what it means to be a member of the Catholic Church: teachings about the Eucharist, for example ...

4. Mission: sent out to serve others --> raise awareness of cha Thong's and cha Chuong's mission works, I suggest some concrete plans and long term projects so the kids can go home and do it and do it for a long time.


================================================================================================
The Fourth Day: Now that we have fun at the Convention and all, what's next?

- Ongoing formation on the Eucharist:
* Nghia Si
* Huynh Truong (I think more important, since they will in turn lead Nghia Si, but it really depends on the condition of each Doan)

- Mission
Got to work w cha Chuong and cha Thong on this. Can we make a commitment? for how long? what involves?
--> get cha Chuong & cha Thong on board to plan for this before presenting the projects to NS

Four days until the Feast of John Bosco

"It is enough that you are young for me to love you." (St. John Bosco)

Considering the sensitivity of our time and our current situation, such saying could be misinterpreted, but for me it reveals the secret of JB's holiness that I am so drawn to.

- Unconditional love. You can compare notes with me: in any relationship at all, the more unconditional love exists, the more meaningful and fruitful that relationship will be, the longer that relationship will last. JB's love for the young creates saints at early age, creates rapport between him and his students that lasts beyond his life time and his geographical location. God is not mentioned in this quote, but if you're on the same page with JB, you'd understand this is the very good news that Jesus wants to communicate to everyone: it is enough ... for me to love you.

- "... that you are young ..." Face it, if you are an adult, loud noise, rowdiness, spontaneity, immaturity, carelessness, etc ... are not something that you are naturally attracted to, unless you see it as the whole-package deal - you love the young, you love what comes with them. It doesn't mean you endore those traits; it only means you accept the young people in your life for who they are. What comes with young people is also the pure enthusiasm toward goodness in life, the passion that they seek for and instill in what they do, ... The late Pope John Paul II once said that young people were not the future but the present of the Church. JPII had the same heart that John Bosco had. If you embrace the goodness of the present moment, you will embrace the beauty of young people.


This saying of John Bosco is enough for me to work on for my whole life. I have to come to God regularly to ask for the grace that can purify my heart to love unconditionally; I have to learn the charity that enables me to accept people for who they are, then I believe the unconditional love of God will do the rest, whether it is through me or through anyone or anything else.


Watch movie about St. John Bosco on youtube

The joy of road trips

A couple close friends gathered at my house one night, and after having some food and drinks, one of us was crazy enough to come up with a suggestion to do a road trip, and the rest was crazy enough to enthusiastically support the suggestion. First we thought of going to Florida, which was at least 5 hours away, but then we decided on Savannah so it would be a little closer, 3.5 hours. One of the guys went back home to borrow his mom's van so eight of us could be in the same vehicle, and while doing so he also picked up another spontaneous guy. While waiting for the van to come pick us up at my house, some of us, including myself, started having second thought. Is this a good idea? One girl had a business meeting at 12 noon, and I had an appointment at 10 the next morning. All thoughts of common sense popped in our heads: the driving would be tiring, especially when it was at night; we would have nothing to do since the beach was closed at night, and no restaurants or other attractions would be open that early in the morning; the appointments that people had the next morning ... But since we had decided, and some were just too excited about the spontaneity, we just kept going with the plan.



We left my house at 1:30 in the morning. The middle bench was pulled out so there was more room for people to sit on the floor to play cards. The music was on and loud. Fun conversations were flying around. Typical fun stuffs of a road trip. But they didn't last too long since it was between 3 and 4 o'clock in the morning, so one after the other eventually fell asleep.



At 4:45 am, we made it to the beach and we were dead tired. We walked around the beach, took some pictures, enjoyed the stars that became so clear in the total darkness of the sky and the beach. We also tried to walk in the water but since it was too cold we quit immediately. After less than an hour, we were on our way back, but not before being the first customers of the day to a local McDonald. Needless to say the general atmosphere in the van on the way back. There were only two drivers for the whole way, and the rest were sleeping. The business meeting had to be canceled, and my appointment was postponed. We made it back to my house at 10 am.

When saying goodbye, someone said through his yawning, "Well, it's been fun, but the next time you suggest something like this, I'll beat the crap out of you."

And everyone laughed, but their eyes were only half way open. Everyone was just too tired.



A pointless trip, some may say. Pure craziness, and pure youthfulness, all spontaneity. Seriously, seven hour driving in the night and early morning for less than an hour taking pictures in the dark, and having McDonald breakfast! Just pointless and crazy. Even I couldn't believe myself being part of this adventure.

But the value is in the road trip itself. It is in the "on the way," in the journey, in the process, more than in what to do once we reach the destination. We will continue talking about this crazy trip for a long time after the event. The next time any of us eight sees each other, it would take only a small reminder of the trip: Savannah, road trip, etc... for us to have a good conversation, "remember that night ...?"

I grew closer to my friends. We have one more shared experience. It doesn't matter what we got to do at the beach, we were together on the way there, and we were there together, ...

Being present to one another through it all, that is what it's all about.

Christmas 2008

Proud to be Catholic, proud to be Vietnamese

In persecution, Vietnamese Catholics in Hanoi bring back the beauty of Catholic traditions, ones that overcome the evil communist government that is still ruling the country.

- Ready for martyrdom: 8 people on trial, thousand standing outside with palm leaves in hands, symbol of Christian martyrdom. Each wears a cross and image of Our Lady. They are ready to stand up for justice and truth to the point of self-sacrifice.

- Unity: 8 people on trial, thousand came to show solidarity outside, vigil prayer offered two nights before with thousands attended, another vigil with a crowd of 3 thousand offered 1 week before in a city far away, and during the day, different Masses, prayer services were offered for them throughout the country and even abroad.

- Self-sacrificing shepherds: priests and religious led the procession to the trial house and stay with them until the end of day, many priests in the city concelebrated Mass that morning to pray for the 8, archbishop sent his personal secretary to be present at the site, bishop from other city sent notes to encourage and congratulate after,


See pics here
http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5hFaNWDuuQ4A1hcYeEtbf3GoGu5AwD94UDVSO0

and here
http://www.vietcatholic.net/News/Html/61817.htm

Evil still exists in the world, the communists still rule the country, but the Vietnamese Catholics have made a statement that, I think, shakes them to the core: we live in a reality that is more powerful than any evils in the world.

Mary Magdalene (a different homily)

Disappointment and confusion- who has not experienced at least once in life? Looking at our life stories, can we deny their existence? Being uprooted from a place and a culture where you grew up, then being placed in a totally new place and new culture you had never known of before, disappointment and confusion are the daily reality.[1] But when one sees hundreds of these people gather faithfully every week to worship God, he must wonder what it is that these disappointed and confused people experience in their worshiping that keeps them coming back. Have you ever asked yourselves such question? To be honest, some may come to Church every week because they want to be connected to their community and their culture in this foreign land. There is nothing wrong about that. But there has to be something more in this faithful community. There has to be Someone who holds everyone together despite all the disappointments and confusions they may experience. Maybe the story of Mary Magdalene encountering the risen Christ in the Gospel[2] can help us reflect on our own faith.

The Mary Magdalene in the Gospel today has always been believed to be the same woman who weeps and uses her hair to wipe her tears that fall on Jesus’ feet. Even though there is no text in the Bible to prove such, it has always been the belief from the early Christian Church[3], as well as in the more contemporary Bible commentaries[4]. Another significant tradition in the Catholic Church is that she is given the title “Apostle of the Apostles,” because of her story in this Gospel passage[5]. The other Gospel reports that as soon as she could after the Sabbath, Mary Magdalene, together with some other women, visited the tomb. Though John’s version of the story does not indicate whether there were other women with her or not, but one thing we can conclude: she saw the empty tomb, went away to tell Peter and John about it, they came and saw what she told them then left, but she came back and remained at the empty tomb[6]. She stayed behind and wept. Here we see the image of a Mary Magdalene who loves Jesus so much and so personally. Furthermore, John tells us that she wants to touch Jesus after recognizing Him. These details are what make many Scripture scholars in the Catholic tradition believe that this Mary is the same Mary that weeps and wipes Jesus’ feet before he was crucified, and the same who remains at the cross when everyone else has left Jesus[7]. It is the personal and powerful love for Jesus that makes her come back the second time, and remain at the tomb[8].

John writes that Mary “bent over to look into the tomb.” John wants to build the expecting mood in the readers – expecting for the resurrection of Jesus, just like the expectation of the two disciples on the road to Emmaus[9]. John clearly knows how to help readers relate their life stories with the stories and the messages He wants to convey in His Gospel[10]. The death of Jesus causes her disappointment; the empty tomb causes her confusion; but her reaction is to keep coming back and remain at the empty tomb. Her reaction is to keep looking and hoping, though she does so while weeping. Isn’t it the story of our lives, the lives of those who may experience disappointments and confusions, yet keep feeling the urge to reach out, expecting to encounter some great news? Mary Magdalene’s love-filled reaction reflects the wonderful nature of human beings that we all share. Deep in our being, there is a tendency that keeps us searching and reaching out to touch our Origin, our Creator, the true goodness and true fulfillment. It is so deep yet so powerful that we keep doing that despite the confusions and disappointments in life. Many theologians believe that we are created from the goodness of God, and the yearning to be united with God is the nature of our being[11].

The good news is that it is not only we who are searching and reaching out. The Gospel passage continues: Jesus appears to Mary but she does not recognize Him at first; but after Jesus calls her, “Mary,” she recognizes him. When Mary is unable to recognize God, God finds a way for her to recognize Him. So we see that God is also reaching out to us. “Why are you weeping?” and “What are you seeking?” These are the questions asked by a loving shepherd who knows His sheep and know how to reach out to His sheep. This is the wonderful love story between God and men. The passage says that Jesus calls her by name, “Mary.” It confirms that Jesus is the good shepherd who calls his sheep by name. Then Mary responds: “Rabboni!” She recognizes Jesus as the teacher, just as a sheep recognize her shepherd[12]. After recognizes Jesus, Mary wants to hold on to Him, but Jesus does not let her, because He has not “ascended to the Father.” John wrote His Gospel after a long life reflecting on the deep mystery of Jesus’ life. In this passage, He wants to present the theology of a Christ who is from God, and after His rising from the dead, is re-united in full glory with God[13]. So the ascension is used to describe as the coming back into this union, rather than the linear development of the story: dying, rising, then coming back to the Father, etc. Jesus knows Mary is clinging on a Jesus who just rose from death, the same Jesus that she experienced before (thus she wants to touch him as she did when weeping and wiping His feet). But this risen Christ is no longer the one before the resurrection. He wants to invite her to know another Christ who is in His true glory in the union with the Father. When reading this, we can’t help but remember the promise Jesus makes before the final sacrifice. He says that He has to come back to His Father so that the Holy Spirit will be sent to those He loves, and when the Holy Spirit comes they will remember everything Jesus taught and will be strengthened to do what Jesus asked them to do[14]. Jesus wants to invite Mary to enter into the most perfect relationship of the Trinity. Men were actually first created from this relationship, but, because of the fall of Adam, have lost it. Now that relationship is restored by the Paschal Mystery of Christ. The greatest news for human beings is that Jesus’ Father is also our Father: “I am going to my Father and your Father,
to my God and your God.[15]” This is the theology of resurrection and of Jesus’ good news that John wants to communicate to us[16].

Jesus then commissions Mary to go back and tell others of this great news. Mary has been the person who carries the news about Jesus. She is the one who earlier told the apostles of the empty tomb; she is now the one who will tell them the risen Christ with His true identity in the glory of Father. That is why Mary Magdalene is called by the early Fathers “Apostle of the Apostles.” We have seen the faith journey of Mary and her encounter with the risen Christ, and hopefully we can relate them to our own. Her story gives witness to a loving God who does not stop reaching out to us as we are reaching out to seek for Him. What we are incapable of doing – reaching the true God – Jesus has done for us through His Paschal Mystery: suffering, dying, rising and ascending to the Father. What was true for Mary Magdalene two thousand years ago is also true for us today. When we bring our life stories to God, full of disappointments and confusions may they be, Jesus that we are seeking will reach out for us, and through His Paschal Mystery at each Eucharistic celebration will invite us again and again to enter into the perfect relationship of the Holy Trinity, the one that we were once created[17].


Notes:

[1] This homily targets parishioners who are first-generation immigrants in the US, age range 30 – 70.
[2] Gospel reading on the Feast of Mary Magdalene, July 22, 2008: John 20:1-2, 11-18.
[3] Ronald Brwoning, Who’s Who in the New Testament, p 299. Also International Bible Commentary: A Catholic and Ecumenical Commentary for the Twenty-First Century, 1498.
[4] The International Bible Commentary: A Catholic and Ecumenical Commentary for the Twenty-First Century, 1498.
[5] The International Bible Commentary …, 1498; also Women in Scripture: A Dictionary of Named and Unnamed Women in the Hebrew Bible, the Apocryphal/Deuterocanonical Books, and the New Testament, 122.
[6] The International Bible Commentary …, p 1498.
[7] Ronald Brwoning, Who’s Who in the New Testament, 301.
[8] Ancient Christian Commentary on Scripture: John II – XXI, 343.
[9] The New Interpreter’s Bible: General Articles & Introduction, Commentary, & Reflections for each Book of the Bible, 842.
[10] This is my reflection based on the literary criticism of John’s writing style. I found that this literary criticism, which is a part of the historical critical method in interpreting the Bible, is important in understanding the Scriptures. See The Pontifical Biblical Commission, The Interpretation of the Bible in the Church: Address of His Holiness John Paul II and Document of the Pontifical Biblical Commission (Boston: Pauline Books & Media: 1993), 35-40.
[11] One of the themes from the Fundamental Theology as I have garthered.
[12] The New Interpreter’s Bible: General Articles & Introduction, Commentary, & Reflections for each Book of the Bible, 842. Also The International Bible Commentary …, 1499.
[13] The New Interpreter’s Bible: General Articles & Introduction, Commentary, & Reflections for each Book of the Bible, 843.
[14] Ancient Christian Commentary on Scripture: John II-XXI, 347.
[15] John 20: 17b.
[16] The New Interpreter’s Bible: General Articles & Introduction, Commentary, & Reflections for each Book of the Bible, 843.
[17] I choose to begin the homily by bringing up a relevant reality in the parish (immigration history) as a problem and tight that into the Good News and of the Eucharistic Liturgy at the conclusion. This is a deliberate approach to giving homilies suggested in: Bishops’ Committee on Priestly Life and Ministry, Fulfilling In Your Hearing: the Homily in the Sunday Assembly (Washington, DC: USCCB, 2005) 23-28.

Mary Magdalene

Two of the more recent successes in the cyberspace that are considered phenomenal are “myspace” and “facebook.” What common between these two, as well as the many earlier successes, are their capacity to build networks of friends regardless of geographical locations and regardless of the members’ backgrounds. Within these networks, people who may have never seen each other in real life can exchange information, pictures, video clips, discuss different topics, buy, send and receive “virtual” gifts, etc. As far as members, one can find in these networks youngsters sharing stories of their latest crush in school, as well as some doctors sharing pictures they took at their latest vacations. I am not trying to analyze the success of this phenomenon, but would like to suggest that it points to a very deep yearning of every human beings – the yearning to feel connected and belonged.

Why do we get together with friends at a coffee shop, or spend hours on the phone with them, if not for building connections, from which life stories are shared, and from which everyone can be assured that their friends know what is going on in each other’s life. Mary Magdalene came to see Jesus for the first time, she was also in such condition as we are in. She brought her life stories to Jesus, the life stories that almost no one of her time, and maybe even this time, would approve and would want to share. They are the stories of brokenness that are caused by brokenness, they are the stories of sufferings and slavery, they are the dark stories of human beings, and too often they leave deep scars in each and every soul. She brought those stories to Jesus in the hope that Jesus would hear her and know what is going on in her life; and Jesus did not failed her. He understood what she was just another victim of brokenness caused by sin; but not only that, He also knew human souls are capable of reaching out, in their limited way, for God’s mercy through their faith. He then enters the relationship with her and makes up for what is missing. He listens, He understands, He consoles, He forgives, and He defends her. Could you ever ask for a better friend than that? Mary Magdalene was overwhelmed by that loving friendship in Jesus. Such friendship is now the force that sets her out in a new life: free from sin and its slavery. That friendship starts from a very personal encounter, so strong and deep that when the resurrected Christ, as we witness in the Gospel today, calls her by her name, “Mary,” a personal gesture between friends, she immediately recognizes Him.

We were talking a minute ago about the wonderful communication means on the Internet today. They are actually serving their purpose of connecting people, but obviously this connection is not complete, and definitely not perfect. Not too long before their invention, there had been blogs, then xanga. They are like online diaries where you can post not only your writings but also media files. But these inventions were not the first inventions. There had also been emails and Instant Messanger before them. These communication means are constantly changing, one replaces the other for better solutions and better services. But there is still that emptiness and loneliness deep inside regardless of how many hundred friends one may have on the Internet, yet alone in the real world. The friend Jesus that Mary Magdalene found in her life is different. Her friend is so extraordinary that she did not recognize Him at first when He just rose from the death. According to the commentaries in the New American Bible, Jesus was immediately united with the Father since the moment he rose from the dead; the ascension is actually just the termination of his physical presence on earth[1]. Jesus has entered into His full glory at the resurrection. He has washed away all our sins when on the cross blood and water flown from His pierced side. That is the moment that Baptism is established. Jean Daniélou also posits that at Baptism, we are given new life by the Holy Spirit, free of sin and full of grace[2]. The Holy Spirit has enabled us to be God’s adopted children. That is why we can cry out in our prayer, “Abba, Father!” (Rm 8: 15-15). The Paschal Mystery of Christ has restored the sonship that has been lost since the fall of our father Adam. The suffering, death and resurrection of Jesus have started a new life, a life that is filled with God’s life. Mary Magdalene’s friend, who is also our friend, can give us the very life of God.

In this friend, the deepest need to be connected is satisfied. But that is not all of the good news yet. After Jesus rose from the dead, He is able to send the Holy Spirit to His followers, and He did not stop doing it ever since. Every time He appears to the disciples, He breathes on them to send them the Holy Spirit. Now things are even more excited when the Holy Spirit comes, and even Jesus agrees with that. “Amen, Amen, I say to you, whoever believes in me will do the works that I do, and will do greater ones than these” (John 14:12). That same Spirit who anoints Jesus, and whose power Jesus has used through out his ministry on earth, the Agent of His resurrection, is now personally given to His friends. With this Holy Spirit, the sacrifice of Jesus more than two thousand years again will happen again in a moment at the Eucharistic table. Scott Hahn suggests that these works are what Jesus means when He says “greater works” than his own works[3]. The new life as children of God will begin again every time someone receives Baptism. Sins will be forgiven ever and ever again. Vocations in life, whether marriage vocation or priestly vocation, will be empowered and confirmed again and again. The Holy Spirit will come with all of the true gifts necessary for a life in grace through Confirmation. The life of grace will be made available and easily accessible to all his children in the world. The life determined for us from the beginning, and promised to be fulfilled in the end has been made possible to start right here in this world.

What do we have to do to receive such wonderful gift of new life and the forgiveness of our sins? The answer is we cannot do anything much, really. God alone can save us and give us this new life. The only thing we have is our faith and trust in God. The Church teaches that “sinners are justified by faith in the saving action of God in Christ. By the action of the Holy Spirit in baptism, they are granted the gift of salvation, which lays the basis for the whole Christian life. They place their trust in God’s gracious promise by justifying faith, which includes hope in God and love for him.[4]” The friend of Mary Magdalene in the Gospel today, who is also our friend, is like none other before and after. His saving mission is accomplished through His self sacrifice. He has done something that a Creator could do. He again confirms that He is the Lord of all the universe, the creator of all. The almighty God who has been there before time and who will be forever in His fullness of glory. He is also the personal God who calls Magdalene by her first name, so does He us our first names. What a great deal Mary Magdalene has. The same is true with us. The Lord of the universe and our Creator is our personal friend. We do nothing to deserve such grace; there is not anything we could do that make us worthy of such gift. The only thing we have to do is to open ourselves, totally open, and come to that wonderful friend with an open heart. We come with our faith and trust, regardless of our brokenness and weakness. Just come to Him, and He will do the rest, the rest that is beyond what we can comprehend.

[1] The New American Bible, Wichita, KS: Dvore & Sons, Inc., 1987; and Catholic Bible Publisher, 1970. See commentary on p. 1166.

[2] Jean Daniélou, The Bible and the Liturgy (Notre Dame, IN: Notre Dame University, 1956): 3-17.

[3] Scott W. Hahn, “Temple, Sign and Sacrament: Explorations in John’s Gospel,” Letter & Spirit 4, (2008): 70-91.

[4] “The Lutheran World Federation and the Catholic Church Joint Declaration of the Doctrine of Justification (31 October 1999),” The Christian Faith in the Doctrinal Documents of the Catholic Church, 7th edition, edited by Jacques Dupuis, 844-852, (Bangalore, India: Theological Publications in India, 2001): p 847.

What's with the picture on top of this blog

You may wonder.

It's St. John Bosco, and in case you don't know who he is, you should google search learn about this marvelous man.

John Bosco is a saint of the Roman Catholic Church who lived in Italy in the 19th century. The Church honors him as a holy man who could find and provide examples for others the holiness in an apostolic Christian life. The world honors him as a great educator whose approaches and methods are still so much relevant to today's youth and to the current education situations. His spirit and his works are still very very much alive and vibrant all over the world today, especially in and through the great network of Salesian family that includes a religious congregation for priests and brothers, another one for the sisters, an association for lay people, and numerous other religious groups and orders and associations, who, though were not founded by JB himself but, were founded on the foundation of his spirituality and his apostolic approaches and spirit. Needless to say, youth themselves, yes, I said youth, take a great part in this network. Maybe not too strong in the US, but look for those Salesian Youth Movement groups all over the world and you see what I mean.

So how is he personal to me except for the fact that my middle name is actually John-Bosco? It's God's providence that my father picked him as my patron at my baptism when I was a baby myself. My Salesian life started before I enter the Salesian Congregation (the SDB's) and continues after I left them.

Wherever I am, whatever I'm doing or will be doing, I'm a Salesian, and that is not just something I am emotionally attached to. The memory of my adolescent years confirms it, my paths in life, whether educational path, professional path or spiritual path, confirms it. My temperament and my personality confirm it. The great peace and joy from my prayer and sacramental life confirms it. My associations confirm it. To tell you the truth, I've been waiting to see whether there is something that doesn't confirm this vocation of mine ... So far the good God has not sent that sign over yet.

So how do I sum up what it is about this man and his spirituality that I am attached to? I'm afraid I can't summarize them within the "unlimited capacities" of blogs. It's his approach to holiness, it's his lively faith in God and the Blessed Lady, it's his humanism, it's his ministry approach, it's his love for young people and for others he lived with, it's his spirit so much alive in his contemporaries and my own contemporaries, ... I remember there is a comment for the Constitutions he wrote for his Congregation of men. It goes something like, and I am paraphrasing, the Preventive System (the name of his educational pastoral system) is not a system of kindness, but it is kindness being lived out in any system. I shared that thought with my community almost ten years ago. I've been living with that wisdom ever since, and continue living it now.

I'll let You be the Lord

Having three warm meals a day within the four walls of a seminary, it's easy to forget that some parents out there are worried they might not be able to put food on the table for their children tomorrow. I want to do something for you, parents, but it's not my time yet. I can only be there with you in spirit to hear your worries...

My residence and the college are interconnected. I could get to the classrooms without going outside at all. At 8:30 every morning I sit in a classroom and listen to some wonderful lectures from some great professors. Some friends of mine at the same moment are also sitting in a college classroom somewhere in the world, however, their minds are usually distracted by the debts they owe their schools, or by the concern whether they can find a job they like to do after graduation. I want to do something to help you study, friends, but it's not my time yet. I can only be there with you in spirit to share your concerns ...

I have a spiritual director/confessor that I can easily pour my soul and heart to. I have some intelligent academic counselor who can help me with my academic curiosity. I know when I pick up the phone now and call some friends home, we'll have a great time talking and catching up. It's easy for me to forget that the young people that I came to know before and will encounter in the future are often desperate for someone they can trust, some leaders they can follow, some role models they can admire, some worthwhile direction they can invest their lives to. I want to be in your midst, and if I can't be one of those you need then at least point you to where you need to go, but it's not my time yet. I can only be there with you in spirit, and let you know I understand your desperation.

I can't do anything for my people, but You can both be there and do something for them.

I'll let You be the Lord.

A Cause for Celebration

I missed out anh Tho's ordination in Stockton, CA last week. I had planned to come but the plan just didn't work out. Ordination Mass usually does my soul good when I have a chance to re-examine my belief in the sacramental life. I know I would have also enjoyed seeing so many good old friends through the Salesian family network. It doesn't matter how long I have been away from them, physically, and it doesn't matter what I am doing in life now, I always feel at home being around them and spend time with them. If I can't create the Salesian spirit where I live now, I think I should move to a town where there is the Salesian presence. I just thought of this from my last retreat. I just happened to share the same retreat experience with some high school students. But during the retreat, I just couldn't feel like a Salesian in front of young people any more. Of course with the kids at my church, I'm comfortable being around them, talking, playing, working, praying with them... because I'm their HT, their teacher. Family spirit in the community context ... Probably that is what missing? I don't know.

I do have a community to which I belong. I just sometimes wonder why people come together in my community: Common interest? Common missions? Common faith? Common fears? Common history and tradition? ... Which of such commonalities can bring forth life and spirit that can sustain the community and make it a faith-filled one? That makes me wonder sometimes whether I'm going the right direction when trying to create so many activities for the kids to do these years.

I have in the past established and maintained some meaningful personal relationships with people in my community, but I just wonder if I'm still doing it now the way I'm running my group. I just feel like I'm too caught up with the organizing events to have time for real and personal relationship with the people I'm working for and working with. Maybe that is what missing!

We all need that real presence and real relationship to make our lives meaningful, and that can't be done without the sacramental aspect of our coming together. I want that presence in my life, and want to be that presence to the people in my life.

Congrats, a Tho! Wish you continue being a great Salesian priest.